Finality

Today was Pastor's last Sunday with us.......such a sad day for our church. To sing was one of the most difficult things I have had to do in a long time. I still am struggling with all the why's and how comes. Why does he have to go? Why can people not forgive? Why do others get away with such a judgemental attitude? How come so many have to hurt?

Please, God, send us a pastor that will help us heal...that will be more than what we have lost. Right now, I don't see how anyone can be better than what we had, but You know what is best for us. This will still take a long time to get over, to heal, to forgive those who can not forgive themselves....kind of sounds like the pot calling the kettle black, I guess.

I am learning to forgive, as I know that is what You would want....what Pastor would want....what a true christian needs to do....

Help me keep my eyes on You. To not give up....quit....that is so tempting. Sometimes I just want to go somewhere else so I don't have to see when they are not there anymore.

Please bear with me, Father, as I heal. Help me to not be like those who are judgemental and unforgiving. I love you so much. Please take care of Pastor Tom Johnson and his family as they undertake new and scary things....things they were not ready for at this time. I love them so.

Grieving

God, I am here today because I am struggling to understand why You would want to take our pastor from us. Why do so few rule so many? Why is it that those 2 or 3 always get what they want and nothing ever happens to them? I don't understand. He is such an innocent victim...if he forgives and the other forgives, why not everyone else? Did you not teach us in Your word that forgiveness is the way? Did we not learn that there are no "big" sins or "little" sins? A sin is a sin. Plain and simple. Each day of my life, in church and in work, I will have to look at these people. I am trying so hard to do what You want me to do and love them, but I am really having so much trouble with that.....It hurts too much......I am so angry right now. Please help me Father. I need you now.

Today is a dark and dreary day for our church. The devil is working hard to fight what You have done. Help us, Lord, to recover from this in the way that brings glory and honor to Your name. I love You.

Your servant,
Lisha

Father, Wade had a beautiful service at the local Methodist Church today. He completed Cub Scouts and received his Arrow of Light. Now we are on our way to Boy Scouts! Such a wonderful thing to look forward to!

Then I take a few minutes to reflect on this and I think about how our time on earth is like a Cub Scouts time in the pack. A time to grow and work toward a goal. The goal for them is to achieve the highest rank before moving on to Boy Scouts. Our goal on earth, to grow and learn all we can and work our way to the highest rank WE can achieve, salvation and a place in Heaven with You! What an achievement!

As Wade continues to grow in scouting, may I always remember that I, too, am growing and require constant work on my ranks. Please, Great Scoutmaster, guide me in the path towards Heaven. Help me to be the best "scout" I can be so I can lead others to you!

God, I am trying to take care of myself. I need to be healthy so that I can be there for my child, my grandchildren, my husband, and myself. Help me to have the willpower to stick to a healthy lifestyle. I need to change some really bad habits. Hoping that the next time I mention this topic, there will be good news to share.